Just in case you’re wondering who the hell Richard is, let me tell you you’ll be clear by the end of this post.. The topic is something we hear about but it’s rare we run into someone who is serious about it or someone who will talk about… It’s something personal.. But I’ve found a few women willing to share their stories with me be it one question or seven they were willing to answer and share..
This post is a secret source post.. The names of the people interviewed will not be revealed however it wasn’t their decision it was mine…
~*Ms.No Richard ever…. *~
1. How is it standing on your decision to be abstinent?
“It’s wonderful.. I don’t have any prospects (laughs). I come from a family of lonely women with kids and multiple jobs. Those women are miserable. To me it seems as if they looked at the men they were dealing with and said if you have plans to stick around and be a father.. You don’t qualify to be my baby daddy! … I honestly feel like nobody should get what my husband gets. I also have to be an example to my younger sisters, I don’t believe in “Do as I say and not as I do”…
2. You were in and 3 and a half year relationship, how did that work? Was he at least celibate?
“No ma’am he was absolutely not… He has a baby to prove it!.. I don’t know how to answer that because in reality it didn’t work. He supported what I put on the table but he still did what he wanted to do. It’s like he didn’t pressure me to have sex because I was a virgin, but he still went and had sex with who ever he wanted to have sex with.”
3.Being abstinent and getting with a guy who wasn’t, did you think he was it?
“My insecurities thought he was it. But the half of me that knew my SelfWorth knew he wasn’t. Like I wouldn’t even let him put his tongue in my mouth when we kissed, it was gross!”
4. At this point, what do you think it will be like when you meet the one that’s going to wait?
“I honestly need glitter all over the room or some shit. Something magical is going to happen. I think it will have to be a feeling I can’t put to words and I’m really good with words”
~*Ms.Post baby Richard-less…*~
1. After becoming a mother, what experience brought you to the decision of being celibate?
“After my relationship ended for good. I stayed to myself for a long time. I decided to change and get to know new people . I wasn’t looking or wanting for a relationship but if it happens I didn’t want to do things the way I used to. I needed change, I wanted something real. After talking to a few guys, I was disgusted because I could notice their intentions up front. Most of them just wanted sex, they didn’t even have to say it. I decided then to be celibate. I want a guy to want more than just sex from me. I’m worth more than that. “
2.When do you tell the guys who approach you that you are celibate?
“Honestly I haven’t even gotten that far with a guy to even tell them I’m celibate. I’m pretty old fashion when it come to dating. I believe in friendship, dates, and getting to know each other without being sexual. When a guy get to talking about sex before they really get to know me, it’s an instant turn off. “
3. How has your life changed since you’ve made the decision?
“Since I’ve made the decision, I’m so much happier. It’s not always easy but I have more respect for myself. I feel like I have more worth because I won’t let just anybody have my body, especially in a world that glorifies sex and brainwash people into thinking it’s the equivalent of love.”
~*Ms.No more Richard…*~
1.How long have you been celibate? What brought you to that decision?
“Since last December. GOD! Nothing or anyone could have brought me to this decision but him.”
2.After making this decision, was there a time when you regret not waiting from the start? Why or why not?
“Yes! Definitely…it’s so worth the wait. Not waiting was dumb and pointless..from the people to the situations”
3.To be celibate it seems you have to be well guarded from the company you keep to the things you listen to, was it hard distancing yourself from certain people and things?
“No, because I know what I want and need out of life. Saying “no” became easier once I really started to get in the word. But I have made a bad decision since by putting myself in a situation I wasn’t prepared to handle…which makes it easier to keep myself out of sinful situations. I still listen to music other than gospel but I feel like I’m strong enough to not let it influence me. “
4.When you tell people or they find out you’re celibate do you get criticism? And how do you deal or respond?
“Lol yes almost all the time. But I just laugh with them. but still encourage them to become celibate too because I know the outcome of obeying God or choosing not to obey him. “
Does everybody understand what I’m referring to when I say “Life without Richard?”… This may seem some type of vulgar but however when a mans name is Richard often times you’ll hear someone call him “Dick“… So there’s the title Life without Richard (Dick)… An abstinent or Celibate life…
These were some really cool and brave women who allowed me to be all up in their mix when it came to there sex life or lack there of.. It’s dope to get a different perspective on things gives you something to actually think about….